Well, today was full of struggles and triumphs.
Sometimes I'm not sure why Levi is crying. Is he hungry? Is he tired? Does he have a diaper rash? Does he need to be changed and pottyed? What is the problem. It is really difficult when I have a headache too because then it's like a hammer is being driven into my head with each piercing scream.
I had a few of those moments today. Mostly he was just tired.
It's really the worst when you think, "Maybe he just wants to go on his potty." and that's NOT it. That's when his face turns really red and he is really going, except that it's worse for you because it's right in your ear as you are holding him trying to make the noise into his little ear so he can at least hear you. It's only partly rewarding when you take him off and see that he did actually pee, but he is no happier. Lord, please have mercy on me!
That's what I keep finding, this whole mothering thing of potties and diapers and breastfeeding and all of the craziness of having an infant, of being a mommy, is calling me to my knees. There are so many times when I have to just give up and pray. I keep thinking that I can do things on my own, but then my pride puffs me up and Levi is peeing on the floor... but then at my weakest time when I am done with everything and it all seems hopeless because he has not once gone on his potty today I put him on just to see and make his noise and he starts to grunt and not but 30 seconds later he has pooped on his potty. Why can't I always have those weak, I give up moments? Probably because reverse psychology doesn't work with God. :)
Another day, another set of diapers to clean. Until next time,